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Friday, October 21, 2016

My Joyful Mysteries of Miscarriage

This year, in memory of our Elisha who we lost to miscarriage three years ago, I wrote a few short meditations for the joyful mysteries of the rosary pertaining to miscarriage. I couldn't find any shared online, the ones I found were for the sorrowful mysteries. While those are beautiful, I want to focus less on my sorrows and more on the joys of the life that God has given us. Since the day I miscarried Elisha fell on a Monday this year the joyful mysteries seemed especially appropriate. On that day I was able to pray over these mysteries with my close friend and my family, what a beautiful gift.

Some of these sentences I copied with only slight modification from other writers online and so the sources are listed at the end. These sources are beautiful in their own ways, read on if any of this is of interest to you. If my short meditations help in any way feel free to use my words, and please comment and share if further thoughts on these mysteries come to mind.

The first joyful mystery, the Annunciation. 

‘Openness to life’ means accepting God’s will for us. If we must endure the loss of a child through miscarriage, it is essential not to give in to hopelessness, but to realize that God has a plan for each unique human being he creates. It’s not easy for a couple to surrender their life-giving capabilities to God’s design and to accept whatever comes from that. True ‘openness to life’ means becoming like Mary, a “handmaid of the Lord.” It means being open to whatever God chooses for us, whether it’s a healthy baby for us to raise, or one for Him to hold in heaven. We pray for a true openness to life, whatever that brings to each family.

The second joyful mystery, the Visitation. 

As Elizabeth was able to accept Mary’s help and companionship in her time of need, we pray that families in all situations accept and feel the blessing of the help and prayers offered in their need. We pray also that each person be open to the call to reach out as Mary did for her cousin.

The third joyful mystery, the Nativity of our Lord Jesus. 

The birth of a child is always a joyful event, but some families struggle with sharing in the joy when they remember that their miscarried child had no joyful welcome into life. We pray that those in grief can still appreciate the joys that life brings and welcome the baby Jesus into their hearts.

The fourth joyful mystery, the Presentation.

The Presentation is a chance for us to consider the great gift that is our children. They are our sanctity! A child is a complicated gift, however; he or she is not really ours, and we must be at peace with giving the gift back to the Giver when He asks us. There is no greater act of love for God on the part of any grieving parent than to hand their child over to Him. In naming the child, acknowledging the existence of the child, they are recognizing their role as a parent. They are taking responsibility for their relationship with God in the creating of the child in the womb. In the act of naming and surrender, healing can come into the heart and a relationship be created which is rooted in truth and in the love of God. May we live out our Presentation like Mary.

The fifth joyful mystery is the finding of Jesus in the temple. 

Just as Mary and Joseph were separated from their son for a time, and thought him ‘lost’, so also are we separated only for a time from those we have lost. We pray that all might find their way to their heavenly reunion with those who are separated from us for only a short time.

Sources of inspiration: (pages 54-55)